While I'm not one to complain about how I look, and I'd rather berate others for not being anywhere near as confident as they should be, there are certain times, I've found, when you just feel awkward and out of place.
And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Mind you, I'm not trying to be hypocritical here. As a matter of fact, I'm being quite the opposite. When you're generally happy about the way you look, and happy with life and everything like that, then the occasional moment when you just don't feel your best is just fine. I'd assure you that you have no reason to fret about your looks, and then leave you well alone.
However, when you are constantly putting yourself down, and I'm forced to listen to how crappy your hair is every twelve seconds when it looks exactly the same as it did the day before and you had no problem with it then, that's when I start to get slightly ticked off.
Do not get me wrong. I am not so arrogant that I would state to never fall into one of these depressions. I did so today, as a matter of fact. It was during musical theater, when we choreographing "Cabaret." We had to act sexy. We had to do sexy poses. We had to be sexy.
Which I just can't do. I find myself handsome, cute in that bookish way, so on.
But not sexy. So I just felt excruciatingly awkward.
I'm over it now, I suppose. But it's interesting to see how five minutes can change your mood entirely.
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