A Letter To The School

To whom it may concern,

There has been an issue about why I have been coming to first period neither A Day nor B Day, an essentially missing six classes each of Earth/Space Sci. Hon and English IV, or what is now known as “Senior English.” There is a real reason and an honest reason, the real reason being my already financially distressed home has faulty wiring, and recently that’s been affecting me, causing my alarm clock to shut off randomly during the night, and not waking me until well past eight. And as we have no money for gas or bus fare, I am then condemned to walk and don’t get to school until around nine thirty.

When you read the above, you see it as nothing but a blatant excuse, and me pretending it is anything but is offensive. Which is why I’m thoroughly acknowledging that I actually could be trying harder to wake up, finding other ways to get to school, and imploring my elder friends who have already graduated high school to give me a ride. Which brings me to my honest reason.

In all honesty, I found this “inconvenience” as an opportunity to not come to class. Not that I find anything wrong with the subject or yourself, the teachers, but rather I find something wrong with my peers and the class itself. At times, the sheer size of both leaves me feeling harrowed, intimidated, and slightly claustrophobic, while at others the very people I’m forced to associate with gives me an undeserved feeling of superiority and contempt. There are occasions at which I feel I am actually losing brain cells, due to the inevitable gossip-mongering, the conversations about how much a car smells like chocolate-chip cookies, and certain people complaining about their love-life to me. It comes in turn that I become so irritated towards said offenders that it’s any wonder I’m able to control myself and not start a huge and incessant hate-fest.

When I failed both classes and was offered Accelerated Learning for the two courses in the beginning of this quarter, I was so biased towards both that I had reservations about joining, and thought I would just take the courses online next year. I did join, however, and during my first class actually found it freeing and mitigating. It had a sense of individuality, and because I could rewind and review the lectures at will, it gave me a sense of control. I could take the course at my own pace, which, though I was able to in both classes, I found myself unable.

In English, to do so would mean to have to stay after school or after class, which I found I really had no incentive to do so, as staying after school would mean missing work and staying after class would mean missing Drama. I had no urge to do either. Missing work would mean missing payment, which I so desperately needed due to the aforementioned poor financial status of my family, as well as my need to save money to rent my own apartment and move out. Missing Drama, on the other hand, was not in the slightest what I wanted, because Drama is actually a class I enjoy and am expecting to pursue a career in.

To ask for help in Science would, unfortunately, subject me to a never-ending tirade of insults and put downs, and no matter how good-natured they are, there’s only so much one can take before snapping and yelling back. I fail to understand why people such as David and Jon pick on me for the sole reason that I won’t fight back. In comparison, admittedly, this reason pales, but despite the argument that I shouldn’t let such comments get to me, the fact remains that they do, and I had no desire to give any more excuses to make me feel like a worm.

I passed the first semester of Earth/Space Science in three days, with an 81% average. English, on the other hand, took me nearly two weeks, though I am 92% finished with the course, with only one more test left and a 91% average. And I still believe I’m retaining the knowledge. I think that I would be able to pass, despite the conflict in subject matter, that if a test for the first semester were submitted to me again, I would still be able to pass.

I began wondering if I could merely ask to drop both Earth/Space Sci. Hon and Senior English for the purpose of taking both classes in Accelerated Learning. If I could finish one semester of Science in three days and one semester of English in two weeks, it goes to follow logically that I would be able to finish the second semester of both in the same or similar amount of time. Given that there are approximately three weeks left in school, this seems a logical course of action.

And yet, I am discouraged in this solely because they feel I “will not be able to complete and fully comprehend the subject matter in that amount of time.”

Isn’t this up to me? I have taken the time to write this letter to try and persuade others to let me attempt this, as I feel it is the best choice available to me currently. I realize the reasons and excuses I have given are, at best, adolescent and redundant in the grand scheme of the education of the whole student body, but I do not feel compelled to complete any course in which I am forced to suffer unnecessarily. The more individual approach that Accelerated Learning offers appeals to me, and I feel I can walk away with more accomplished than if I were forced, yet again, to sit in a crowd of my peers trying to control my rage and frustration.

Sincerely,
J.C.X.D.R.